WIDE

Monday, March 9, 2009, 4:33 PM

Hey its been 5 months since i updated .
Decided to blog again because i'm bored and besides i have too many problem which i have no where to spill to .
Problems from be it coming from friends , relationship , guyfriends , and bestfriend , family and studies .
Thinking of these problem sumtimes give me a huge headache which will never stop until i sleep and wake up the next morning .

School so far is okay . I think i can manage my subjects . Only fer art i think that i've been laggin behind time for all my coursework . I'm really lost into what really i should do and where to begin . I've started on a few drawings already . But really i'm really lost and dont really know what i'm doing . All other subjects are okay but i think i'll need to try harder to get more than just a pass for every subject .

Friends . I really think that friends who stays and helps a lot are really the one you should treasure most .
The one who's always there to give you a listening year when you really got nobody else to really talk to . The one who always share's her stuff with you hoping fer nothing in return . The one who picks up your call when you got no one to talk to . Friends with benefits are the most f*cking people i know . They are really not ur friends , ther just want sumthing in return from you . Thats is why they are so close to you and somehow they declare that they are your friends . They take what they want and never give back in return . They are liars and backstabbers . They never appreciate you . They just want sumtink from you . They only come to you when they need something . Other than that dont hope to go to them for a listening ear or a helping hand . They'll never ever help .

Recently , i just lost my bestfriend . Lost as in not as if she passed away . Lost as in missing from my life .
She was a very important person in my life , until she said that hurtful things which cut throught my heart like a knife . My 12 years bestfriend wasnt the same girl i knew . She's change . She wouldnt say those hurtful things like she did if she really thought about my feelings and about our longterm friendship . I want to change myself for you only that you have to change yourself too . Realising how long we've not meet made me missed you . No more talks on the phone with you animore . It really made me sad sumtime when i wake up to go to school every morning when i get down from the lrt you'll always be waiting below . And now knowing that you're no longer there , moving on with your life in ite . It really saddens me that you're nolonger the same girl i one's knew . Tht grazy , funny , ever so caring person i once knew . I guess i just really want to wish you all the best in life and really be succcesful . Being without you this year really sadens me , we've been friends for a very long time . Eversince when we were kindergaten we are alredy friends . Bestfriends . From kindergarten to primary school to secondary four . I really hope that you'll text me one day . And i really hope you could diffrenciate which one are your friends or foe .

Relationship . They've really got my mind spinning . I'm done with this one guy i thought i onced love . But it really got me thinking why i was with him in the first place . Everything from the start was all a mistake . One by one each problem arises . From then i knew we was not made for each other . We had to many things that was not common . Everyday was like a world war 2 for us . I really grew tired and gave up . I knew he deserve better sumone who can tolerate his behaviour better . But i'm sorry the person is just not me . He's made for sumone better who understands him more deeply enough . Eveything that he did to me is like i coudnt put it behind me . I'm sorry i really thought i can go on and treat you like my friend . I just coudnt , i need time to get over everything . And i really hope you'll stop disturbing me cos it will only irritate the hell out of me . I need my time and my own space .

And i'm really thankful that i have someone to talk to these days . The one who never fails to made me smile each day . The one who never got sick to text me everyday . The one who's always there fer me .
(:

Thats oll fer tday . I'll blogg again soon .

Labels: Moving on